Grief is Hard

I am member of a grief forum online. In this group there are mothers who have lost their children to drug overdoses, killed by drunk drivers, murdered, suicide, SIDS, during delivery, during pregnancy, etc. It gets to me a little bit reading every story & looking at every picture. I try to limit my time on there per day as it can make you a bit paranoid & depressed.

Everyone knows that there is a time & place for politics & religion & I for one, do not believe in a group setting of difference of opinion you should bring up either unless you are ready for a war. 

"Where is your GOD, while my baby was dying?" was the caption under their child's picture. I felt compelled to answer this question, as well as a few other ladies. Some answers were not what I thought of our God, some answers were right on point with what the bible says, etc. I actually had not thought this particular "discussion" was getting out of hand. Mom's were giving their two cents worth & no one was getting mad. When all of a sudden a commenter took it too far. Cursing God & actually cursing me, as well as all the other "bible beaters". I sucked in my breath & kept my composure. Not like this woman was going to listen to what I had to say anyway. The whole post was deleted eventually anyway.

I understand when parents are new in grief that it is hard. There are more questions than answers. I understand that not everyone believes in our loving God. I do not judge, it is not my place. I still pray for every parent that is living the rest of their life without their children, every day. People do not realize there is a Satan too as they are bashing God. It actually just breaks my heart.

A few posts I read just make me confused. For example, "I do not know if I believe in God, but will you pray for me anyway?" When I am thinking, if you do not believe, what would you like me to pray for exactly? or "I trusted God & believed in Him & then this happened! Why?" When I am thinking, if you ever really believed & had faith, how can you question Him?

I am sure I sounded like a few women in the forum. After I lost Nehemiah, I would get so mad when I would hear of someone else finding out they were pregnant, especially if they were not married, used drugs, did not have a job, did not take care of themselves or their existing children.

Then one day, JD told me to just snapped out of it! He was right. Who in the world put me in charge? For one I was that teenage, unwed mother & I am sure there were plenty of women who hated me. 

I am just really thankful that our God is an understanding God. We fall down, He lifts us up. We get angry with Him, He forgives. 



I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13