Giving it Up to God.....

I have handful of blogs on that I just cannot help but check up on everyday.

It is like God is leading me to certain people to give & get encouraging words.

Some of the blogs I have read, the person's whole life has been completely turned upside down & inside out, but they continue to have trust & love in Christ. I think it is awesome!

I do not recall a time being mad directly at God when I lost my son. I remember being mad at myself or just the fact of not having him here with me. But I can honestly say I have not been mad at God. I am not saying I am perfect for this, because I am not. I admit I have mentioned times that it sucks & it being unfair. I have asked WHY? a thousand times. Was I not good enough, did I do something wrong, am I horrible mom to the ones I have, do I not deserve any more? But I have never cursed God nor turned my back on Him. If anything, this has actually brought me closer to Him. (Amen)

One day I was asking myself, why do we have to be so sad when someone dies? What about death makes us so sad? Why can't we be happy & joyful that they are lying in waiting for our Savior to come get them?

I praise God for giving me my little time I had to share with my son. Even though he was not breathing when he was born, he was surely alive inside my womb! I got to see him on the sonogram screen at 12 weeks moving around so much. It was like watching a fish in water!! I started feeling him move at 15+ weeks. I love those two things the most, besides when I got to see him after he was born.

Those are my memories I will hold on to for now. I know in my heart that one day Jesus is going to come back down to earth & take us all home. Then, I will get to play with my son & be with him for all eternity.

One more thing before I go, I am turning it ALL over to God, right this moment! I have believed my whole life that Jesus is my savior, but I know that I have not completely given it to Him yet. I trust Him & know He is the alpha & omega, the beginning & the end. I will walk in His path & I will let Him lead instead of me trying to lead myself & glorify You always. Jesus take my heart & make it Yours. My will is Your will. Amen

Before I go here is one thing my friend David Ramos twittered about & I wanted to share: "I always had a problem w/ the bumper sticker: Jesus Is My Co-Pilot. -He should be in total control! I dare u to try it. Give him the Wheel!"

I'm In Better Hands Now (lyrics)

by Natalie Grant

It's hard to stand on shifting sand
It's hard to shine in the shadows of the night
You can't be free if you don't reach for help
You cant love if you dont love yourself

There is hope when my faith runs out
Cause I'm in better hands now

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground
So take this heart of mine there's no doubt
I'm in better hands now

I am strong all because of you
I stand in awe of every mountain that you move
Oh I am changed, yesterday is gone
I am safe from this moment on

There's no fear when the night comes 'round
I'm in better hands now

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground
So take this heart of mine there's no doubt
I'm in better hands now

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground
Its like the world is silent though I know it isnt true
Its like the breath of Jesus is right here in this room

So take this heart of mine there's no doubt
I'm in better hands now
I'm in better hands now

Tonight's Prayer

Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart,
All you who hope in the Lord. Psalm 31:24


Dear Heavenly Father:
With all of this news of people losing their homes & jobs, I first want to pray to you tonight to give thanks for my many blessings: my family & friends, my home, heat, a car, a job & my health.
I pray for the numerous people with many financial worries, to give You control. I pray they are able to find jobs, & the ones who have not lost their homes yet, I pray they are able to keep their homes & not fall into Satan's traps of stealing, murder or suicide. I pray they find the help they need. I do pray no one in my family loses their jobs due to layoffs.
I pray for the all the little babies fighting to stay in this world. I pray for their parents to continue their faith in You. I pray for Your hands to guide the doctors' hands; keep them steady & nurturing. I pray for the doctors not to give up, even when they feel there is no more to be done, until the very end.
I pray for anyone suffering from an incurable disease. I pray they have peace & do not suffer.
I ask for forgiveness for my sins.
I pray for guidance to be a better Christian, a better wife, mother, sister & daughter.
In Jesus' name I pray,
Amen