October is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month.
If you live in the Amarillo area here are a few things going on this month you may participate either as an angel parent, angel grandparent, angel sibling, angel aunt, angel cousin, angel uncle, friend of any of these listed, etc.
"A Walk to Remember"
Saturday, October 1, 2011 @ 10 am
Memorial Park-Area # 1( east side of park) 2400 South Washington.
This walk is for parents, grandparents, siblings, health-care professionals, friends to observe National Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month.
World Wide Wave of Light
5th Annual Pregnancy and Infant Loss Candlelight Vigil!
Saturday, October 15 · 7:00pm - 10:00pm
Amarillo Botanical Gardens (next to the playground)
1400 Streit Dr. Amarillo, Texas
I was thinking this morning about the people I have met after becoming a parent of an angel. I have met people I would never have met any other way & also caught back up with friends whom I had lost touch with, even gotten closer to a friend or two.
They always say God brings people into your life that you will help or who will help you. I do not think you can ever fully help someone who is going through something unless you have been in that same spot yourself.
I am thankful for the friends I have made & bonds that have gotten stronger because of my sweet Nehemiah. I miss my angel baby everyday, but it makes me feel good to think that he is making some really special friends up in Heaven. He is in great company!
I wear a pair of shoes
They are ugly shoes
Uncomfortable shoes
I hate my shoes
Each day I wear them and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step
Yet, I continue to wear them
I get funny looks wearing these shoes
They are looks of sympathy.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs
They never talk about my shoes
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world.
Some women are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt
No woman deserves to wear these shoes
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.
~Unknown Author
I have been thinking back to a conversation that was being held between a group of friends. I was not part of the conversation, nor was I not eavesdropping. I was actually with a person who was part of this group & taking it all in.
The conversation was about a young man who had died in an automobile accident. He left behind his parents, siblings, numerous friends & family, & a fiance.
The group was discussing how sad it was that he had not gotten to marry his fiance & how sad she must be. One person even chimed in to say that they hoped she was not being left out, since she was just the fiance.
I was daydreaming, drifting in and out of the conversation, until one man said, "At least she can still remarry".
My ears perked up, the way dogs do in movies & I listened closer as everyone else chimed in on how that was true, true, true. Then I was screaming inside of my head "I hope you did not say that to her!".
Oh, how to this day I wish I had said something. Not just anything. Not anything sarcastic. Not anything to belittle them. Just something that would have made them realize what the man had just said & what each individual had just agreed to.
It is this way with any kind of tragedy I suppose. There are those who would say:
"You can always find another partner"
"You can always have another baby"
"At least you have other siblings"
"At least you have your other parent"
"At least you have other children"
I know people mean well, one never really knows what to say to another person who is mourning. Especially one who has never experienced it first hand. I myself still do not have all of the words I wish to say to another person who is grieving the loss of a baby/child, but I do know what not to say.
So, if I could rewind time & go back to that one day, I would have to politely say, "But she will never love another, the way she loved him".
The point I am making today is, no matter how well our intentions are, think before you speak.
