Saturday, July 30, 2011

Strong & Steady

I have started this post three different times today. Getting a few sentences out & then realizing that I was rambling or what I had written had no meaning. So, here I start again & decided to go a different route.
I always thought that after my loss I would always be there for my friends & family if they were to ever face the same ordeal of losing a child. However, I have found this tough & not as easy to comfort someone as I had originally thought. I feel absolutely helpless, but I hope that I do have the right words when the time comes. I know that my loss has meaning whether that is to help someone else out or to show what love I have for our Lord even through such great tragedy.

Today I went to the memorial of a sweet baby girl whose life was short & brief, yet has brought so much to my life & I know for many others who were following her story as well. She grew in her mother's womb for 32 weeks with a birth defect that we prayed would not take her life. We prayed that she would be healed & live a normal life. We prayed she would be used to show us how to fight. Unfortunately, God had another plan.

I had never been to a memorial for an infant & it was quite an experience, as well as heartbreaking. The pastor spoke of this baby as if she had lived for 32 years. It was comforting & he said some things that my husband said he had needed to hear.
Her parents are strong & steady. Letting the Lord lead them & turning to Him for comfort. This is how He wants it. He wants us when we are at our weakest. When we are at our lowest. When we are at our darkest. He loves us & knows what we can handle.

Right now it is not understandable why we must endure so much pain. In the end the reasoning will be shown to us.

My prayer today is for all of those mommies & daddies who not able to hold their babies in their arms; for peace & comfort as they must go on living with a piece of their heart missing. To one day know this too will be made right.

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