Today is the day we give Thanks & enjoy a huge feast with friends & family. Why is this day highlighted more than any other day? Shouldn't everyday be Thanksgiving?
A few days ago I re-post a story that I had put out here on a previous Thanksgiving & I hope everyone read it (again) & shares it with others. Click here to read it.
This year some of our family could not make here this year. We will definitely be missing you guys!
All month myself & a few others have been posting on our Facebook accounts what we are thankful for. I love the idea & I had even posted a prayer, which I would love to share with everyone as I close this post.
Dear Heavenly Father:
I pray to You this holiday season for peace & comfort for those who are missing those dear to them. I pray they not forget why we celebrate Thanksgiving & Christmas. I pray that while they remember their thorns, I also pray they remember the crown of thorns You wore. I also pray they remember that one day we'll be back with the ones we love for a Glorious celebration with You in Heaven Father! ~Amen
Sandra felt as low as the heels of her Birkenstocks as she pushed against a November gust and the florist shop door. Her life had been easy, like spring breeze. Then in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a minor automobile accident stole her ease. During this Thanksgiving week she would have delivered a son.
She grieved over her loss. As if that weren't enough, her husband's company threatened a transfer. Then her sister, whose holiday visit she coveted, called saying she could not come. What's worse, Sandra's friend infuriated her by suggesting her grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer. "She has no idea what I'm feeling," thought Sandra. "Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?" she wondered. For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life but took the life of her unborn child?
"Good afternoon, can I help you?" The shop clerk's approach startled her.
"I ... I need an arrangement," stammered Sandra.
"For Thanksgiving? Do you want beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the 'Thanksgiving Special'?" asked the shop clerk. "I'm convinced that flowers tell stories," she continued. "Are you looking for something that conveys 'gratitude' this Thanksgiving?"
"Not exactly!" Sandra blurted out. "In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong."
Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the shop clerk said, "I have the perfect arrangement for you."
Then the door's small bell rang, and the shop clerk said, "Hi, Barbara ... let me get your order." She politely excused herself and walked toward a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and long-stemmed thorny roses. Except the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped. There were no flowers!
"Want this in a box?" asked the clerk. Sandra watched for the customer's response. Was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers! She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed.
"Yes, please," Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. "You'd think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again," she said as she gently tapped her chest.
"Uh," stammered Sandra, "that lady just left with, uh ... she just left with no flowers!"
"Right, said the clerk, "I cut off the flowers. That's the Special. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet."
"Oh, come on, you can't tell me someone is willing to pay for that!" exclaimed Sandra.
"Barbara came into the shop three years ago feeling much like you feel today," explained the clerk. "She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had lost her father to cancer, the family business was failing, her son was into drugs, and she was facing major surgery."
"That same year I had lost my husband," continued the clerk," and for the first time in my life, had just spent the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too great a debt to allow any travel."
"So what did you do?" asked Sandra.
"I learned to be thankful for thorns," answered the clerk quietly.
"I've always thanked God for good things in life and never to ask Him why those good things happened to me, but when bad stuff hit, did I ever ask! It took time for me to learn that dark times are important. I have always enjoyed the 'flowers' of life, but it took thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort. You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others."
Sandra sucked in her breath as she thought about the very thing her friend had tried to tell her. "I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God."
Just then someone else walked in the shop. "Hey, Phil!" shouted the clerk to the balding, rotund man. "My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement ... twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems!" laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue-wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.
"Those are for your wife?" asked Sandra incredulously. "Do you mind me asking why she wants something that looks like that?"
"No ... I'm glad you asked," Phil replied. "Four years ago my wife and I nearly divorced. After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord's grace and guidance, we slogged through problem after problem. He rescued our marriage. Jenny here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she learned from 'thorny' times, and that was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific 'problem' and give thanks for what that problem taught us."
As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special!"
"I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life." Sandra said to the clerk. "It's all too ... fresh."
"Well," the clerk replied carefully, "my experience has shown me that thorns make roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember, it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don't resent the thorns."
Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on resentment. "I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please," she managed to choke out.
"I hoped you would," said the clerk gently. "I'll have them ready in a minute."
"Thank you. What do I owe you?"
"Nothing. Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first year's arrangement is always on me."
The clerk smiled and handed a card to Sandra. "I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would like to read it first." It read:
"My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns.
I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns.
Teach me the glory of the cross I bear;
Teach me the value of my thorns.
Show me that I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain;
Show me that, through my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant."
Praise Him for your roses, thank Him for your thorns. When the going gets tough, the tough seek the Lord!
At holiday time, many people are dealing with loss & are often caught in a dilemma between the need to grieve & the pressure to get into the spirit of the season. Holidays or not, it is important for the bereaved to find ways to take care of themselves. The following guidelines may be helpful:
1. Plan ahead as to where & how you will spend your time during the holidays. Let yourself scale back on activities if you want to. Redefine your holiday expectations. This can be a transition year to begin new traditions & let others go.
2. Select a candle in your loved one's favorite color and scent. Place it in a special area of your home & light it at a significant time throughout the holidays, signifying the light of the love that lives on in your heart.
3. Give yourself permission to express your feelings. If you feel an urge to cry, let the tears flow. Tears are healing. Scientists have found that certain brain chemicals in our tears are natural pain relievers.
4. Shakespeare once said, “Give sorrow words…” Write an “un-sent letter” to your loved one. expressing what you are honestly feeling toward him or her at this moment. After you compose the letter, you may decide to place it in a book, album or drawer in your home, leave it at a memorial site, throw it away, or even burn it & let the ashes rise symbolically.
5. When you are especially missing your loved one, call family members or dear friends & share your feelings. If they knew him or her, consider asking them to share some memories of times they shared with your loved one.
6. If you live within driving distance of the cemetery, decorate the memorial site with a holiday theme. This could include flowers, garlands, ribbons, bows, evergreen-branches, packages, pine cones or a miniature Christmas tree. Decorating the site yourself can be helpful in remembering & celebrating your loved one's life during the holidays, and may free you to cherish the present holiday with your remaining family.
7. Play music that is comforting and meaningful to you. Take a few moments to close your eyes and feel the music within the center of your being.
8. Give money you would have spent for gifts for your absent loved one to a charity in your family member's name. Consider donating money to the public library to buy a particular book. Have the book dedicated to your loved one's memory. Buy a present for a child who would not otherwise have a gift during the holiday season.
9. Read a book or article on grief.
10. Remember the reality that the anticipation of the holidays without your family member is often harder than the actual holidays themselves.
"God comforts us in all our afflictions so we in turn maybe able to comfort those with the comfort where with we are comforted by God." 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
I just celebrated my birthday as well as my 30 week mark! Very exciting I must say! That means we only have 9 weeks to go.
At my last appointment I had to do the 1 hour glucose test. Yay! Something I wish the fathers had to do as well. Anyway, I got a call a week later to tell me I FAILED & would have to do a 3 hour glucose test & I am anemic so I have to add an iron pill to my daily regimen.
So, Saturday, I got up early & went to the hospital. I registered & then drank my 8oz. orange glucose drink, gave a urine sample & a blood sample.
Thirty minutes later, gave another blood sample; however, I could not give that urine sample.
After an hour I had to give another urine sample & blood sample.
After another hour I had to give another urine sample & blood sample.
After just one more hour, it was time for one more urine sample & one more blood draw.
Well, I got my call earlier this week & was told my glucose test was normal this time. Wew!
I have to stay on my iron pill though, since the baby is growing so much he will need more of my iron & since I am having a c-section, there will be blood loss. So, I have to keep taking this pill. We also found out that if the hospital is not already full, we get to plan our c-section to January 11, 2011! I guess we will find out for sure in two weeks when we go back to the doctor.
We are getting excited though! We bought our first baby item & I think it has helped ease some anxiety, especially with my husband. It is a pack-n-play with Monkeys on it! It is super cute & we already have it put together in our room.
I do not know why I am so fascinated with the monkey theme. We registered at Babies R Us & they had all this monkey themed baby stuff, so that is when it started. Besides, if this baby comes out like his sisters he will be hairy!
Now we are planning our baby shower. Well, actually, I just e-mailed one of our cousins all the information I had & she is going to get started planning our shower. Then, not long after that our little baby boy will be making his grand entrance.
